The Diary of the Wasteland Bear God — Season Two — Episode One: To Hell and Back… [Part Two]


Last time on The Diary of the Wasteland Bear God[Part One]

Despair sat in and doubt began to fill him wholly. What hope do I have?

Then, someone, he wasn’t expecting chimed in. “We’re looking for a way to get you back, Sin. Hold on!”


The Bear’s eyes opened and hope had renewed. Look for a summoning stone! Make a portal! Something! Just get me the hell out of here!

“No! I will not permit it! You will remain here, in your nightmare for all of eternity,” Diablo cried.

While the demons and Diablo were busy fighting the Bear God, more and more lesser demons were being converted into wraiths that served the Outer Gods. Some manifested into Faceless Ones and began spreading their whispers of madness; turning demons against one another. Soon, Diablo would take note of this and wage war against the space oddity.

“Fiend, you dare challenge the Lord of Hell in his own domain? You will pay for your act of aggression!”

“In the end, you will all serve the Outer Gods,” the tentacle-being spoke in a garbled tongue, but transmitted its voice to everyone’s mind.

Diablo roared in anger and waved his hand for all the demons to slay the space beast. They were turned into ash, while more were being converted to the maddening whispers.

The space oddity spoke its garbled tongue again. “You, Lord of Hell, will be the first to lead our new charge…our new crusade”

Diablo roared in anguish as tentacles dug into him and corrupted his being wholly. All the red in him diminished and he turned into an ashen vapor with flailing tentacles and raging eyes. The new figure snarled at the Bear God.

“What…the hell…is that?” asked the Bear God aloud.

Demons changed their focus to the new enemy that dared attack them in their realm. Thousands upon thousands soon would be converted, a world overrun. They were demons no more.

The dark figure spoke in a thunderous voice. “You call yourself a “god” and yet, here you are, powerless, alone, broken. Your friends cannot save you. Your precious Maker cannot save you. Accept your defeat and be assimilated by the Darkness.”

“Do you mean The Darkness? Like, are we going to start singing “I Believe in a Thing Called Love?” or do you mean Tim Curry’s Darkness? I am a fan of both but I’d like some clarification. Oh, but if you’re God’s sister then I guess I’d say that’d be pretty cool, too. She was pretty hot.” The Bear God rambled on a moment before being interrupted by a massive roar that shook the Demon realm.

“Such insolence. Then again, how fitting that a bumbling fool such as yourself would give themselves the label of “God.” You’ve created nothing; no life, nothing to bring a warrant to the lesser races to give a cause of worship. You’re just an overpowered, washed up, age-old Druid with nothing left except self-loathing and for that, I pity you. You’re just a meager, small being in the universe. The apple of another false “God” that does silly stories and passes them off as quality writing. You’re just a figment of someone’s horrible imagination.”

The shade smirked, expecting anger in retaliation.

The Bear God shrugged. “So, what?”

The wraith was surprised…maybe, it was hard to tell with all that black stuff—or mist—swirling about.

“Oh, you expected me to go all mighty and smite you? I’m not always gung-ho about the violence bit you know. It’s fun and pretty entertaining at times, don’t get me wrong. I like a fight just like any other Saiyan, but, uh, I think that we could spend an entire season or so discussing political, science, religion, and other views. That’s not what I am about. I am about fun, and frankly, I don’t give a damn about the Maker’s writing or storytelling. Because I got some news for you, sugar tits. You’re written in the story, too. So, you just degraded yourself. Good job.”

“ENOUGH! I tire of your long-winded remarks. If you will not join us, then you can just die,” the shade hissed angrily.

“Summons incoming!” A familiar voice echoed.

The Bear God began to dematerialize before all the angry shades. “Maybe I’ll see you guys on Valentine’s Day,” the Bear God added, winking.

“No! After him!” the former Lord of Hell roared.


Before Rubricon and the others there formed the magnificent bastard that was The Bear God.

“You’re back!” Ben patted Sin on the back.

The giant bear looked at all those around him. “Thank you, all of you,” he said with a heavy sigh, “I am tired as balls.” Then he collapsed to the ground in exhaustion.


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